假使我能原諒我自己?

What if I forgave myself? I thought. What if I forgave myself even though I'd done something I shouldn't have? What if I was a liar and a cheat and there was no excuse for what I'd done other than because it was what I wanted and needed to do? What if I was sorry, but if I could go back in time I wouldn't do anything differently than I had done? What if I'd actually wanted to fuck every one of those men? What if heroin taught me something? What if yes was the right answer instead of no? What if what made me do all those things everyone thought I shouldn't have done was what also had got me here? What if I was never redeemed? What if I already was?   from "wild"

假使我能原諒我自己?無論我做過的那些事有多不堪?假使我就是一個騙子並且對我做的那些事情沒有藉口?要是我說我很抱歉，但若我能回到過去我還是不會選擇走另外一條路?假使我就是想跟我遇見的每個男人發生性關係?假使吸食海洛英教會我一些事情?假使那些荒唐我都不應該拒絕?又假使就是我做的那些沒有人贊同的事構成了現在的我?假使我從未被救贖呢?或是我早就被救贖了?    摘錄自 那時候 我只剩下勇敢